Actions Speak Louder Than Words... (Eri)

"This is me talking, maybe?"
'This might be me thinking?

She couldn't sleep, what a surprise. It wasn't the cold that had kept her awake, nor the loud snoring of one annoying pack member, no it was worse than that. The nightmares had returned, with a vengeance. Eri had been hopeful when they, strangely, seemed to fade but doubtful all the same that this welcome lapse, in what was an ongoing struggle with herself and her dreams, would last. And so she had been right, without fail after five days of safe sleeping, the dark twisted dreams returned. They taunted her, disallowing her to catch up on what everyone need; sleep. It made her irrevocably tired and even more unresponsive than normal, her eyelids drooping as she sat in the woods alone. Ah, the Einser Woods. They meant so much to her and yet it had been through this woodland and beyond that the real life nightmare had begun. It all seemed so long ago, such a distant time, and yet it was all so fresh in her mind. The scars had not healed despite what she had told Ghost, what she had told the pack, but they would believe her to be damaged goods what ever she told them. She was too strange, too quiet, too elusive for them to bother with her. Eri sighed, feeling a strong pang of loneliness from deep within her chest. This threw her slightly, it was unlike her to wish for the company of others yet alone mourn the lack of it.

She padded on, feeling slightly unnerved by the fact that here was the place where her life changed forever. The ivory she-wolf turned and headed east, now emerging from the misty forest and trotting towards the bluffs. Her tongue lolled slightly from her slender muzzle, and the feeling of the breeze in her soft downy fur was refreshing. The sun had just begun to rise and the view from the cliff top was simply breathtaking, Eri could not help but feel slightly more at peace. She took comfort from the way the golden and pink light cast guiding rays across the land, it made her feel at ease, indeed nature had this effect on the little canine. It was as she slowed to a walk that Eri spotted him, the tall muscular figure of Adyn. Her brother too had always had a certain appreciation for the world around them, his sister had assumed this had been passed down from their parents. Eri swallowed at the thought of how her father had used to take them up here and watch the sunrise; just as they were doing now. She flattened her ears, narrowing those mahogany red eyes at her sibling. Whenever she came into contact with her boisterous, confident brother all she could think about was how easy his life had been, and was. How he never had to go through the aftermath of such a destructive past, Eri sighed.

She had thought that returning and spending time with Adyn would make her feel closer to Ma and Pa but instead being alone with him drove her insane with guilt and incomparable sadness. He had been the perfect child, she however had ripped their whole family apart. How could she possibly be close to him, she didn't want to have be reminded of everything that had happened over the past two years every time she glanced into those identical eyes. Eri shook her head slowly, and turned silently in hope of making a quick and unnoticeable exit.

"This is me talking, maybe?"
'This might be me thinking?

The small alabaster she-wolf tensed at the sound of her kin's voice. It felt so strange to hear him say her name, as though nothing had changed over the past two years. As if they were both just sweet, innocent, loving siblings who didn't know anything about life. Well Eri for one was anything but that, the same however, could not be said for her naive, confident brother. She didn't want him to understand, he never would. Even if she tried to explain to him the predicament she had once been in, her twin simply would not be able to empathize fully with her. It would come out wrong, it wouldn't sound like it had been and to be honest there were truthfully no words for what she had been through. Adyn was not the type to 'get' what other wolves were feeling for he himself had never suffered a single days hardship in his entire soft life. For that alone, Eri resented him. She could not stand that he was the perfect pack member, that he was cherished and held an upstanding place in their extended family. Earth had pampered the tall, lean male since the very day his parents and sister had vanished from his life. Still, it wasn't his fault and his female sibling scolded herself internally at the way she seemed to instinctively blame him for all of her hideous mistakes.

She allowed his bold voice to seep into her attentive ears, her identical eyes closed against the beautiful morning glow. Eri wanted to pretend, even for the smallest amount of time, that she was alone because there was no going back now. Adyn had spotted her, and though it had been many many months since she had encountered him properly; she knew him well enough to know he was not going to let her just walk away. Not this time. It was almost four minutes later before the thin, weary she-wolf turned slowly, composedly to face her brother. Her brother. The title insinuated that she loved him, that he knew her inside out, that she could tell him anything but the reality of it all was this; neither of them knew each other at all. Everything had managed to change, one way or another and Eri found her heart hammered fearfully against her chest like a trapped maniacal bird. What if he asked her about their mother, or father for that matter? What would she tell him exactly, how would she be able to describe to him what the Hell wolves had done to their beloved Kari. The gentle, wise she-wolf had often spoken of her son, Adyn and how much she missed and loved him. Perhaps it was her duty to report back to him now on this, to .. comfort him? Bitterness raked her heart violently, it was not her duty to soothe the mere worries of her twin brother when he had lived such a cushy, easy life.

She did not sit down, unlike Adyn. Instead she chose to stand uneasily, blankly staring into his matching mahogany red eyes. Eri wanted to turn tail and vanish the way she had came but that was simply not a possibility anymore. At his words that had sounded a while back, the female merely nodded. She did not want this conversation, she never had.